Index-a-sketch

7/03/2011 - Nibbles and Clyde liked to have engrossing conversations about the ideological underpinnings of Karl Marx.

10/03/2011
- Andrew and Sebastian's game of Charades became problematic when Andrew had to mime 'air guitar'.

14/03/2011 - The last thing Sheryl wanted to do after watching The Room was have sex.


17/03/2011 - In retribution for his marital infidelity, Peter was intercepted by pillowfighting ninjas on his way to work. 


21/03/2011 - The Society of Thinking Hats revoked George's membership following his tendency to misplace his hat and ineffectually cover up for it.













 



9/06/2011 - When springtime came, and the broken wing had mended, Flannery released the bird into her velociraptor enclosure.


13/06/2011 - Nobody else at the office knew that Esmerelda ate her lunch at the Secret Sandwich Bar.


16/06/2011 - Bonita liked to involve unsuspecting door-to-door salesmen in her post-apocalyptic roleplays.

20/06/2011 - Daphne reminded her father that he was contractually obliged to attend her kazoo recital.




30/06/2011 - Winston often found Gwen posing mid-fall in their living room, as part of her persistent effort to convince him that time had frozen.


03/07/2011 - After Leslie broke down and admitted that Francis was stifling and overbearing, they decided to see a marriage counsellor. 


07/07/2011 - Victor and Jane were the only spies who had the moves to infiltrate the jitterbug contest.

11/07/2011 - Each weeknight, Archimedes watched anxiously for any sign that Lily had received his love letters.

14/07/2011 - Observing a gap in the marketplace, Jonathan founded the popular casual eatery, Tidy Burgers.


18/07/2011 - After verifying that their meeting place was secure, Mikhail and Sofia assumed their positions for the secret handshake.

21/07/2011 - Samuel's career as a spy never quite took off because of his tendency to chuckle smugly.


26/07/2011 - Nicolette was becoming tired of her grammatically smug baby.


01/08/2011 - Of all his progeny, Chomsky disliked the clumsy one the most.


04/08/2011 - After yet another unconvincing performance, the voting viewers told Coby that the dream was over. 


07/08/2011 - Penelope liked her enemies to die confused. 


10/08/2011 - Now that her archivist parents were on vacation, Juliet could finally wear her collection of historically inaccurate hats around the house.


14/08/2011 - Yuka engineered a charming disguise for Edgar's otherworldly antenna.


18/08/2011 - Richmond and Oscar were concurrently participating in Empathy Week and the 48-hour Metaphorthon.


22/08/2011 - When Humphrey wore his beret, he could pretend for one sweet moment that he was not in prison.


25/08/2011 - Eliza skipped school to attend a kite-flying party with Pythagoras.


31/08/2011 - Filomena made her debut performance as Princess Agaricus in Spores! The Musical.


04/09/2011 - For the final battle, Dominique came face-to-face with her archnemesis, the Multitasker.


08/09/2011 - Reluctant to let his friends find out about his financial hardships, Raphael began to overcompensate.


13/09/2011 - Haikutron's threat module had some unresolved glitches.


15/09/2011 - Ivan knew he could always count on Olga to legitimise his impractical hats.


19/09/2011 - On the last day of term, Ms Chu's vocabulary extension class organised a surprise party.


22/09/2011 - Alfred continued to receive unsolicited phonecalls from telemusketeers.


26/09/2011 -  Haruka was busy collecting data for her thesis on uncomfortable silences.


29/09/2011 - Prudence liked to make new friends. 


03/10/2011 - DIY AssassinMart were known for their discreet packaging.


06/10/2011 - Link quietly reflected that the true curse afflicting Hyrule was prejudice.



14/10/2011 Flora exploited her daughter's undeveloped grasp of time and highly developed grasp of TV tropes.


17/10/2011 -  Ever since they received the wire harness for their birthday, Mimi and Kiki's favourite game was Out of Body Experience.


20/10/2011 - Somehow, Glenda wasn't very surprised when her husband revealed that he was part of a secret league of masked vigilantes, the Superpatriarchy.


23/10/2011 - Baudrillard could not bring himself to eat the fish-shaped kibble, significations of a reality he could never verify. 


26/10/2011 - Lucy spoke to all her allies in code, but neglected to tell them in advance what the code meant.


31/10/2011 - You're Wrong! Here's Why was a topical debate program hosted by Greg Gregson.


03/11/2011 - After nine years of caring for the slinky, the only pet they were permitted to keep as children, the Baird brothers released the slinky into the wild.


06/11/2011 - Ingrid was fond of spontaneously yelling abstract nouns.


11/11/2011 - Hoping the others at the gathering wouldn't think he was lonely, Jeremiah studied the leaves intently. 


15/11/2011 - The highest point of Millicent and Monty's tumultuous year was Trampoline Couples Therapy.


17/11/2011 Rachael's enjoyment of the Michel Foucault doll increased when her parents gifted her with Michel's Deluxe Panopticon Fun House.


22/11/2011 - Pierre made his modelling debut in the fashion calendar Beautiful Young People in Awkward Poses.


25/11/2011 - Nicholas discovered that not only did the birds strip all the fruit from the bowler hat tree, but they spared only the hat that was out of arm's reach. 


29/11/2011 - Sakura's motto was 'dynamite at every fight'.


02/12/2011 - Raymond was factual and encouraging.


05/12/2011 - On the third day of her installation art piece, po(i)nt, Adriana wondered if anybody would notice if she switched arms.


09/12/2011 - Bracing herself, Harriet told Gertrude that she wanted some other way to settle their arguments besides having a dance-off.


12/12/2011 - Although Quentin managed to avoid prosecution, the company hired all the cats in town to stare at him accusingly.


15/12/2011 - Heidi's school craft projects made thought-provoking gifts. 


19/12/2011 - Ophelia forgot that nobody outgunned the Propellerhead.


22/12/2011 - Rufus and Velma's relationship improved when they introduced save points to their conversations.


25/12/2011 - Leon's campaign was built upon a single-minded vision.


29/12/2011 - Mia knew exactly how to distract Natalia.


02/01/2012 - The adults thought Mona was merely frolicking with the leaves, when actually, the leaves were becoming sentient, and vengeful. 


05/01/2012 - Siegfried was devastated by his expulsion from the Non-Sequiturist Party.


10/01/2012 - Woebot and Whybot were incompatible friends.


13/01/2012 - Rita and her friends were unimpressed with the lacklustre facts printed on the inside of their juice bottle caps.


16/01/2012 - Celeste was delighted to receive the heavy metal music box for her birthday.


19/01/2012 - The Grammar Police were becoming oppressive.


23/01/2012 - Darcy's therapy group wore hats to represent the size of their problems, until the metaphor became their common problem.


26/01/2012 - Hubert and Louise hosted the primetime cooking show You Can't Screw Up a Roast (But You Can Stuff It).


30/01/2012 - Roland's latest artwork was sending mixed messages.


02/02/2012 - Katya was stranded on the island for 48 hours.


06/02/2012 - Just when he was about to claim victory, Simon was yet again defeated by Sparkle Power.


09/02/2012 - Anya found brief fame thanks to her smash hit single, 'Wikipedia Flow'.


13/02/2012 - Luke never bought his children's ruses to continue playing past bedtime, however poignant they could be.


16/02/2012 - Helena's parents realised they could not indefinitely avoid participating in their daughter's politically loaded boardgames.


20/02/2012 - Nothing was more exciting for Kim than ninja-dating.


23/02/2012 - Gwyneth never let the possibility of diversification get in the way of experience.


27/02/2012 - As their family grew, Rosie and Oliver took note of their increasing resemblance to their children's drawings.


01/03/2012 - Eunice decided she was ready for augmentation surgery.


05/03/2012 - Anxious about his child-raising skills, Charlie the Confectioner resorted to inventing the Hypnotic Lollipop.


08/03/2012 - Mirella's fan told her the secrets of the universe.


13/03/2012 - The TV series Supers featured paranormal abilities of incredible specificity.


16/03/2012 - After the third level, the Pollard children forgot what they were trying to reach.


19/03/2012 - Othello and Esdemona were star-crossed lovers in the ballet adaptation of Tetris: A Love That Will Not Tessellate.


22/03/2012 - Stuart's housemates finally called an intervention.


26/03/2012 - Pikelet resented it when the girl misinterpreted his total indifference as an endearing sort of contempt.


29/03/2012 - Defeating the wizard was more cathartic than Melodia expected.


02/04/2012 - Johannes embarked on a new research project.


05/04/2012 - Amy liked to think of hand-holding as perpetual high-fiving.


09/04/2012 - Donna pioneered the apathetic balloon-o-gram.


12/04/2012 - Nigel showed off his new place. 


16/04/2012 - Virginia operated a phone sex hotline that catered to esoteric fetishes.


19/04/2012 - Henry was on the longest parachute descent ever.


23/04/2012 - There was no altitude too high for the League of Umbrella Assassins.


26/04/2012 - There was only one thing that Giles was taught to say.


30/04/2012 - As she was contemplating some troubling questions, Kyoko was relieved by a kind offer of assistance.


03/05/2012 - Jemima and Keith exchanged Platonic Friendship Candy.


07/05/2012 - Briony hired a friend to pose as the host of a make-believe TV show to crash her boring dates.


10/05/2012 - During her pregnancy, Sally liked to engineer split-second awkward situations.


14/05/2012 - David's new way of greeting people was getting on Liam's nerves.


17/05/2012 - Joanna's book reports were renowned for their tenuous intertextual connections.


21/05/2012 -  For her birthday, Laura was able to accommodate her social anxiety by throwing a four-legged farm animal costume party.


25/05/2012 - Emily erected a tower from her hardcover textbooks, a monument to her scholarship and a vantage point from which to gaze upon the world.


28/05/2012 - Ever since her break-up, it seemed as if there was nobody that Carrie could really trust.


31/05/2012 - Zoey wished Ian would stop indiscriminately appending 'like a Polaroid picture' to most of his sentences.


04/06/2012 - Sensing that pledging his allegiance was an important decision, Joshua stalled by asking more questions.


07/06/2012 - Sometimes Mr Lindberg doubted his students' commitment to the Semaphore Poetry Club.


11/06/2012 - When she became tired of a conversation, Myfanwy offered responses to unheard questions.


14/06/2012 - It was a sad and fateful day for the Ice-Cream Realm.


18/06/2012 - Whistler and Herringbone were police detectives who specialised in the investigation of labelled crates found at crime scenes.


21/06/2012 - The master unwittingly walked by just as Maxie and Gingercake were sealing their alliance against him.


25/06/2012 - Nobody could withstand the Punslinger.


28/06/2012 - Peggy's pirahna plushies were doing very poorly at the Toy Convention.


12/07/2012 - Helicopier 2000 just wanted to be free. 


16/07/2012 - A meeting was held by the Society of Passive Voices.


 19/07/2012 - Jacqueline liked to write ambiguous yet specific threats in the sky.


23/07/2012 - Nora lost many friends by saying 'hilarity ensues' at inappropriate moments.


26/07/2012 - Les Assassins de Pain were lethal and fresh. 


30/07/2012 - On Wednesday afternoons, Ms Morton supervised the Little Nihilists Club.


02/08/2012 - Tautologibot did everything necessary and unnecessary to fulfil his duty.


06/08/2012 - Nobody was ever quite sure where they stood with Lennard.


09/08/2012 - The staff at the Ice Queen Parlour were notoriously chilly.


13/08/2012 - Blake was developing a strange appreciation for his daughter's elaborate morning pranks.


16/08/2012 - Conversations with Extradiegetic Commentary Bot were always illuminating.


20/08/2012 - Tobias tried to escape an awkward conversation.


23/08/2012 - Jason privately believed that the only effect of Theodore's wizard hat was +5 smugness.


27/08/2012 - After giving it a chance, Phoebe realised she was indeed much happier sleeping indefinitely instead of being social.


30/08/2012 - Giselle and Bruno hosted the home renovation show Everything Improved by Bunting.


03/09/2012 - Conversations with Lingobot caused Lexiconbot to be: 1. Stricken with anxiety. 2. Perplexed; bewildered. 3. Overcome by futile indignation.


06/09/2012 - Emma's cosplays were always the talk of the party.


10/09/2012 - Many faces were saved by Quinn's superhuman ability to sense even the thinnest of spider webs.


13/09/2012 - Cassandra was a disconcertingly friendly assassin.


17/09/2012 - Sir Branagh hoped he would become accustomed to serving the Queen of Tenuous Metaphors.


20/09/2012 - Margo realised that Yvette lacked the necessary subtlety for an effective wingwoman.


24/09/2012 - Nina finally asked Julian if he agreed that his insistence on speaking in pangrams was impeding their relationship.


27/09/2012 - Septimus was becoming tired of his co-anchor's snarky segues.


01/10/2012 - Nobody else at the newspaper knew that one in five of Alan's wine reviews was actually an assessment of a recent kiss.


04/10/2012 - Truthbot Junior was finding his training module very tedious.


08/10/2012 - Partycat failed to get the party started.


11/10/2012 - let's get real with Realist Unicorn (five panels)


15/10/2012 - In times of recession, Malcolm was hired by corporations and governments to quietly defuse protest rallies.


18/10/2012 - Edith and Pippa transported a large pane of glass across town in the hopes of encountering a climactic chase scene.
  

22/10/2012 - Delia liked to conclude all her dates on a reassuring note.


25/10/2012 -
It was always a little difficult getting sympathy from Cedric. 

29/10/2012 - Caleb was tired of Brandon's passive-aggressive hints that he was spending too much time at work.


01/11/2012 - Ludwig possessed telekinetic power over children's ice-cream cones.


05/11/2012 - Floyd couldn't tell her that he had found somebody else to live with now.


08/11/2012 - Keiko discovered that the best power source for her machine was feline apathy towards human endeavour.


12/11/2012 - Humbert and Teabiscuit had been locked in a staring contest for two days.


15/11/2012 - Seymour and Katie realised that it was impossible to argue while wearing their kitty-shaped bonnets.

19/11/2012 - Little did Michelle know that Honeybun was an agent sent from the future to sabotage her crucial research that would later halt the feline uprising. 

22/11/2012 - Butterscotch thought that their trick-or-treat run would have been more successful if Finnegan had put more effort into his costume.

26/11/2012 - During the saddest moments of her life, Regine could always count on Alyosha to arrive on the scene so she would not have to be alone.

29/11/2012 - Muffin and Mr Sock had an insightful conversation about the limitations of interspecies friendships. 

03/12/2012 - Albert had unwittingly purchased a stick of demonic fairy floss. 

06/12/2012 - Chainsawbot was devastated that he could not work in his chosen field.

10/12/2012 - Marion devised a problem-solving flow chart that helped business managers determine whether they required a problem-solving flow chart.

13/12/2012 - Belinda insisted on talking to all the flowers in her garden.

17/12/2012 - Seamus was tired of Gareth using magic to smooth over his social blunders. 

20/12/2012 - Francesca wasn't sure how else to get the message across.

24/12/2012 - Polly was tasked with defusing any conflicts that arose during the family gathering.

27/12/2012 - Earl quickly gained a reputation as a marketing consultant who told you what you didn't want to hear.

31/12/2012 - Gretel parted ways with her 2,012th balloon.

03/01/2013 - Edward was struggling to find a date for the prom.

07/01/2013 - Linus wished his father had recorded a more profound message for his memorial portrait before he died.

10/01/2013 - Within one week of its debut, Slightly Educational was voted the worst children's show on television. 

14/01/2013 - Primrose's confrontation with the Haughty Culturalist was off to a predictable start.

17/01/2013 - Rodrigo developed a strategy for enduring tedious conversations. 

21/01/2013 - Abigail often used armspans to demonstrate unquantifiable concepts. 

24/01/2013 - Whenever a stranger at a bar refused to cease his unwanted advances, Octavia decided to explain with diagrams. 

28/01/2013 - After two days of receiving the silent treatment from Louis, Sandra finally snapped.

31/01/2013 - Although Karl successfully engineered the proposal, he wasn't prepared for this particular response.

04/02/2013 - Hermes was anxious that Meredith would find out about the surprise party he was planning for her.

07/02/2013 - Aurora finally deployed her Emergency Beanstalk.

07/03/2013 - Shirley and Clementine realised that what the balloon animals really wanted was to engage in battle. 

11/03/2013 - To acknowledge his recent failures, Vincent threw himself a Fail Party.

14/03/2013 - Origamibot was an elegant and functional ally.

18/03/2013 - The conversation at Isabella's tea party was heading in an uneasy direction. 

21/03/2013 - Naming his ice-cream parlour A Sticky Situation saved Reuben from many sticky situations.

25/03/2013 - Due to a writers strike, the television drama Impending Adulthood was forced to oversimplify the dilemmas of its adolescent protagonists. 

28/03/2013 - Richard wasn't sure why he continued to attend Denise's passive-aggressive art exhibitions.

01/04/2013 - Pilkington wished that everyone would respect his decision to withdraw from society. 

04/04/2013 - Eugenia's habit of using ambiguous compound nouns was slowing down the brainstorm for the costume parade.

08/04/2013 - While Alice sneaked their father's present into the house, Angela distracted him with difficult questions.

11/04/2013 - Ainslie was certain that the Roomba was stalking her.

15/04/2013 - Among other shortcomings, Kirk showed no regard for other people's dietary requirements.

18/04/2013 - Archna went to great lengths to create situations in which it would be appropriate to say her wordplays out loud.

22/04/2013 - In the hope of mitigating the pain, Geoffrey always followed bad news with not-as-bad news. 

25/04/2013 - Priscilla discovered the quickest way to escalate the awkwardness of a social situation.

29/04/2013 - Sasha spent the morning getting all of her hatred out of the way. 

02/05/2013 - Rather than consigning the excess teddy bear stock to the bargain bin, the toy shop equipped the teddy bears with guilt-tripping devices.

06/05/2013 - It didn't take long to figure out Victoria's new favourite word.

09/05/2013 - The Guerrilla Surprise Party Club's projects were becoming increasingly incisive.

13/05/2013 - Caroline and Rosemary had such a solid partnership that they could keep their cool in life-threatening situations.

16/05/2013 - It didn't go down well when James pointed out that Martin habitually responded to criticism with an accusation of jealousy. 

20/05/2013 - Calvin always gave extremely practical gifts.

23/05/2013 - Estelle hosted the popular children's television program Unexplained Mood Shifts.

27/05/2013 - To add some variety to her shift at the department store, Alison decided to foreground the hidden subtext of her sales pitch.

30/05/2013 - Joseph's show The Magic of Apologies was so convincing that you could swear that you were witnessing a real apology.

03/06/2013 - Imelda prepared a sign for Confront Your Nemesis Day. 

06/06/2013 - Nobody in the class could verify whether Ms Drosselmeyer's reading of Will You Be My Friend? was accurate.

10/06/2013 - Gustav was grateful to have a reliable wingman. 

13/06/2013 - Bridget discovered that it was awkward to attend parties with an imaginary friend who suffered from social anxiety.

17/06/2013 - To perplex his students, Professor Kozlowski padded his revision seminar with unnecessary costume changes and outdated cultural references.

20/06/2013 - Oliver wondered how to tell Wesley that he was doing everything wrong.

24/06/2013 - Dorothy's latest work was confronting.

27/06/2013 - Judith wasn't as interested in picking up as she was in substituting animals for key words. 

01/07/2013 - Anxious that no birds would come to feed at his birdhouse, Ferdinand pre-empted their rejection by installing an audio speaker.

04/07/2013 - Yana and her friends confined their anxiety to a one-hour rally every week.

08/07/2013 - It seemed that whoever had a problem with Edmund also had a problem with writing concisely.

11/07/2013 - Lola and Eileen liked to indulge in mundane activities after successfully returning from a time travel excursion.

15/07/2013 - Due to school budget cuts, Mr Calgary had to generate his own visual materials for his sex education class.

18/07/2013 - Cookie used a text-to-speech program to deliver the bad news.

22/07/2013 - Hannah and Benny embarked on a mutually beneficial friendship.

25/07/2013 - Thomas investigated unsolved puzzles.

29/07/2013 - It was difficult being housemates with Cuthbert the Insecure Clown.

01/08/2013 - Petronella's conversations always resonated with some unspoken truth.

05/08/2013 - Verna was the marketing representative for the new summer fragrance.

08/08/2013 - Pickle realised that the boy knew too much, and had to be eliminated.

12/08/2013 - Cottonfloss was grateful that he could confide in Kelly whenever he was feeling down.

15/08/2013 - Isaac tried to delay the imminent break-up by fabricating elaborate and whimsical dreams to tell Sarah about. 

19/08/2013 - At first, her father was touched that Valerie had made a flag to bring to the big game. 

22/08/2013 - Adrian's latest strategy against misogyny was shouting and pointing.

26/08/2013 - Sugarbell made a point of delaying any adventurer who interrupted her.

29/08/2013 - Marmalade chose to stay with Jennifer because her outbursts of affection were the most inexplicable.

02/09/2013 - Ava was the number one easel salesperson in her district.

05/09/2013 - Ramona conceded that she wasn't going to get another opportunity to speak her mind about Jesse's work. 

09/09/2013 - Matthew tried many strategies to overcome his memory problems.

12/09/2013 - protractile lady won't indulge you any longer (five panels)

16/09/2013 - Eduardo was not the most effective assassin.

19/09/2013 - To pad out the remaining unscripted half-hour of their radio show, Frank and Hector hurriedly created a new segment called Loaves You Loathe.

23/09/2013 - Scott was tired of Nathaniel repeatedly attempting to disguise his laziness with feeble existential hypotheses. 

26/09/2013 - Courtney realised she had committed herself to a tough karaoke song.

30/09/2013 - Sometimes Megan wasn't sure how exactly to comfort her daughter.

03/10/2013 - The Bureau of Infographics struggled to maintain its hold over the hearts and minds of a fickle populace.

07/10/2013 - Daisy discovered that growing older did not prevent every tiny loss from resonating poignantly. 

10/10/2013 - With a limited vocabulary, Sexybot struggled to alert the scientists about an imminent malfunction.

14/10/2013 - Shauna enjoyed all the ways in which Irene rescued her from uninteresting conversations.

17/10/2013 - Just One Guy was not the best superhero to have around in a crisis.

21/10/2013 - During times of extreme frustration, Lucinda would embark on a solo camping trip and redirect her displeasure to inanimate entities. 

24/10/2013 - Cut-the-Crap Bank: let's be reasonable here (six panels)

28/10/2013 - All of Seth's friends quickly learned not to fish for sympathy from him. 

31/10/2013 - Rina was tired of the persistent and unwanted gifts from the fairies at the bottom of the garden.

04/11/2013 - Kupi noted the human's self-confessed vulnerability, certain that it would be useful later.

07/11/2013 - Anwar was in love again, but he wasn't sure if the feelings were mutual.

11/11/2013 - Percival's housemate was taking his imminent departure very poorly. 

14/11/2013 - Once a year, Ebony liked to remind people not to mess with her. 

18/11/2013 - Michael was an extremely validating human to be around. 

21/11/2013 - Mathilda always made sure that she ended her relationships firmly and without ambiguity.

25/11/2013 - Katherine bonded with another lonely soul at the park.

28/11/2013 - Cornelius blew his last chance to confess his romantic feelings to Astrid.

02/12/2013 - When caught trespassing, Danielle's strategy was to preempt the other person's indignation and escape in the ensuing confusion.

05/12/2013 - Eventually, Mervyn was sacked not for his frequent lapses in concentration, but for oversharing with customers.

09/12/2013 - Sonja's usual response to men who employed pick-up tactics from The Game was to insist she was playing other games she actually enjoyed.

12/12/2013 - Selina was the latest celebrity face of the classic fragrance, Antibacterial. 

16/12/2013 - Carson was a maker of finely nuanced cocktails.

19/12/2013 - Margaret's gynaecologist referred to reproductive organs using non-standard euphemisms. 

23/12/2013 - Erica's attempts to bewilder strangers into having a party with her were not well-received. 

26/12/2013 - At every press conference, the Ws showed up to ask the tough questions.

30/12/2013 - Elena spent New Year's Eve singing to her dearest companions.

06/01/2014 - Other people's imaginations always made Ronald feel really excluded.

09/01/2014 - On Point En Pointe was a highly demanding television talk show which combined news commentary and classical ballet.

13/01/2014 - Bernice conducted a research study on polite refusals.

16/01/2014 - 'Go on, then fly,' the bird taunted, and Jake, overcome with sadness, finally accepted that he couldn't.

20/01/2014 - Jamie was tired of searching for Grant's hidden messages. 

23/01/2014 - Alexei debuted his latest artwork, Nooooooooooooooo. 

27/01/2014 - After so many years of sharing a house, it really unnerved Casey that Ira had never not even once remarked upon his hat.

30/01/2014 - Ashleigh's symbolic gesture of letting go of her anxieties led her to acquire a whole new set of anxieties.

03/02/2014 - Evan wasn't really fitting in with the Postmodern Cereal Company. 

06/02/2014 - Each episode of the children's television show The Feels You Feel featured a song that explained a new feeling to its audience. 

10/02/2014 - Marnie already suspected that adulthood wouldn't be that great anyway. 

13/02/2014 - Evie found it sad when two seemingly compatible lovers did not work out. 

17/02/2014 - Yuna decided to try out her new strategy of defusing awkward social situations by talking about the situation. 

20/02/2014 - Camilla reflected on her propensity for losing friends.

24/02/2014 - The schoolchildren's Double Dutch chants were becoming increasingly difficult and obscure.

27/02/2014 - Thanks to hashtags, Bryce could take his passive aggressive status updates to a whole new level. 

03/03/2014 - to celebrate my 300th post, here is a collection of illustrations that I couldn't think up captions for (fifteen panels) 

06/03/2014 - Jolie secured a publishing deal for her Choose Your Own Romance Adventure novel. 

10/03/2014 - Industrial Strength Manufacturing created extremely powerful household products of every kind. 

13/03/2014 - Benedict and Heather were slowly becoming more comfortable with displaying affection. 

17/03/2014 - Erin was known for being an Avocado Whisperer. 

20/03/2014 - For a number of months, Maria decided to tell every single customer that it was her birthday just to see if they would treat her more politely. 

24/03/2014 - Carmen found her niche as the leading model for stock image photography of women standing on cliffs. 

27/03/2014 - Felicity was annoyed that Lawrence was ruining the verisimilitude of her game of The Floor Is Lava. 

31/03/2014 - Claude could not have foreseen the error in doing battle with his archnemesis in the abandoned glue factory.

03/04/2014 - Tara's colleagues noticed that she had been practising her lines rather frequently and randomly of late.

07/04/2014 - Gabriel was not sure whether it was really helpful to listen to Mixed Messages FM first thing in the morning. 

10/04/2014 - Roseanne began to wonder how she could make her encouraging but neutral conversational interjections less prone to misinterpretation. 

14/04/2014 - Nobody would (or could) overstay their welcome in the spotlight after Jessica performed her thirty-minute spoken word poem.

17/04/2014 - Kimchi hoped that Johnny's apparent mood upswing meant that they might be able to eat dinner soon.

21/04/2014 - Stella finally had a talk with Mira about her habit of disguising her true feelings behind ambiguous metaphors.

24/04/2014 - Obadiah was having trouble adjusting to writing for a pre-teen audience. 

28/04/2014 - Charlotte was blessed with the gift of divining messages from the stars. 

01/05/2014 - Julienne unnerved her father with unexplained and highly specific requests. 

05/05/2014 - Norman's makeshift roving Help Kiosk was causing a lot of confusion, but, to his credit, he was quick to correct the confusion that arose.

08/05/2014 - Due to a clerical error, Lyndon spent all day assembling a robot who, instead of paying him compliments, would only complement his current mood. 

09/06/2014 - Caris enjoyed substituting the word 'snog' for 'song' in the titles of books.

16/06/2014 - Later, the faculty accused Mr Lorca of attempting to influence the results of the school-wide Spelling Bee by lowering contestant morale.

23/06/2014 - Sergio agreed to look after Annabelle's goldfish while she was abroad.

30/06/2014 - Daniel was in such a hurry that he failed to wholly apprehend his daughter's explanation of her latest project.

07/07/2014 - Jefferson pitched his cost-saving measures to his colleagues at the University of Western Australia.

14/07/2014 - Pocket Robot and Pocket Robot called an end to their bitter rivalry once they realised they served different functions.

21/07/2014 - Early product testing for Shirella's Hahahaha wallpaper yielded consistently negative responses.

28/07/2014 - Hildegarde's command of outdated pop culture references and tenuous rhymes helped her attract a partner for her taxonomy project. 

04/08/2014 - Experience had taught Noelle to be suspicious of men who applauded themselves as good guys.

11/08/2014 - Kristen was looking for a new co-conspirator. 

18/08/2014 - Evelyn liked to introduce tension to conversations by arbitrarily inserting the phrase, 'Now we're even.'

25/08/2014 - Mavis's game of Cults was quickly escalating.

01/09/2014 - Spelling "I LOVE YOU" in flower petals was taking more time and materials than Dumpling banked on; now, with Guy home early and the plan only half-executed, she couldn't help but feel that she looked like a jerk now. 

08/09/2014 - Lucinda continued to find small daily outlets for her overwhelming bitterness.

15/09/2014 - Boris and Ricardo were committed to creating hot new trends for themselves every day.

22/09/2014 - As the play wore on, the young audience was increasingly uncertain as to whether they were watching a puberty education play or an exceptionally bitter parody of a puberty education play.

29/09/2014 - A Sap ASAP was an organisation that specialised in the interdimensional transportation of an unrelated person into the vicinity of your crime who could take the rap on your behalf.

06/10/2014 - The poll results were in: the family unanimously agreed that Ilona's latest date was a jerk.

13/10/2014 - words that helped me (15 panels)

20/10/2014 - True to form, Maxwell didn't realise he was being serenaded.

27/10/2014 - Vernon let Lydia in on his insurgency plot.

03/11/2014 - Remington's love of orderliness was causing chaos in the household.

10/11/2014 - Maude was really bad at cutting ties.

17/11/2014 - Each serve of Geraldine's Sober Sorbet came with a free sobering fact.

24/11/2014 - Piecrust wasn't sure how to tell Alexandra that he actually really wanted to be a geophysicist.

01/12/2014 - Lucinda was dealing with her inexhaustible bitterness just fine.

08/12/2014 - The students picked up on Ms Chan's reluctance to comply with the principal's new A Sock Puppet In Every Classroom mandatory initiative.

15/12/2014 - The popular downtown restaurant SOON was known for its helpful yet ominous waiters.

22/12/2014 - Lindsay and Phillipa agreed to kill the imposter.

29/12/2014 - thank you for your (three panels)

02/02/2015 - Sensing imminent defeat, Elodie's archnemesis desperately shapeshifted into what he hoped would be a staggeringly adorable final form.

09/02/2015 - One day, just to see what would happen, Christopher decided not to get defensive.

16/02/2015 - Vena felt sorry for everybody and everything. 

23/02/2015 - Right up until the end, Fennel and Petra's friendship was characterised by devastating honesty.

02/03/2015 - Something inside Tiffany was corrupted irreparably on the day she encountered the butterfly that killed her father.

09/03/2015 - Ursula liked to make seemingly innocuous statements that somehow became more disconcerting when she failed to elaborate on them.

16/03/2015 - Kathleen made the discovery that life wasn't all it was cracked up to be under the sea.

23/03/2015 - Stanislav regretted casting that irreversible scepticism spell on Yulia.

30/03/2015 - jerk detective (five panels)

06/04/2015 - Chrissy believed in facing life's adversities with a spring in her step. 

13/04/2015 - Casper invented special days, like Be An Asshole To A Plant Day, of which he was the sole observer.

20/04/2015 - To improve student attention, Ms Cheung began delivering all of her lessons as if they were clickbait listicles.

27/04/2015 - Fyodor could not brood in the rain for very long without some well-meaning fool drawing him into a non-consensual heartwarming scene.

04/05/2015 - The first rule of Overapologising Club is that you do not have to apologise for being in Overapologising Club.

11/05/2015 - For some reason, Quincey thought that Literal Bot would be a better partner in this particular call-and-response.

18/05/2015 - One of these days, Cecil vowed, any day now, he would be the proprietor of a successful business that sold incongruous rhyming goods.

25/05/2015 - To undermine boring party conversations, Hina would echo a common sentiment of the group and ominously add, 'In theory.'

01/06/2015 - Every year, Greeting Cards 4 Eva launched increasingly miscalculated advertising campaigns to bolster their declining relevance.

08/06/2015 - All the naysayers were wrong: becoming a witch did solve all of Georgina's problems, and enabled her to carry out her perfect fantasy exit from a terrible relationship.

15/06/2015 - Sophie's recently estranged father's bitter parting gift to her was actually enormously comforting.

03/08/2015 - It was a relief when Stina found a fellow odd, lost thing.

10/08/2015 - At the magic convention, Andrej launched his new enterprise: Abracadaver, an exclusive funeral planning service for magicians.

17/08/2015 - It had become something of a recess-time tradition that Meerna would tell Nellie all about the unsettling bedtime story from the night before.  

24/08/2015 - Viola and Cadence were the founding members of the Birds-That-Look-Like-Representations-Of-Birds Watching Club.

31/08/2015 - when you play the game of romance, you win and you cry (two panels)  

07/09/2015 - Try as she might, Elizabeth couldn't help mixing up the next line when singing the chorus of 'Chicago' by Sufjan Stevens.

14/09/2015 - Vanessa and Juanita specialised in making cheerful rejection bunting.

21/09/2015 - Carmen was in high demand to model for stock karaoke video footage of women tenderly touching architecture.

28/09/2015 - The family donned their most persuasive hats and brought their requests to the master en masse.

05/10/2015 - are you mad at me (twelve panels)

12/10/2015 - Randall's strangely specific nervous speech tic posed a challenge in very particular roles.

19/10/2015 - Arnold hated it how earlier and earlier every year he had to listen to Nikolai complain about how earlier and earlier every year he has to listen to people complaining about how Christmas merchandise is sold earlier and earlier every year.

26/10/2015 - Gregor the misanthropic flower liked to sabotage the lives of humans by giving poor career advice; this human was catching on. 

30/11/2015 - It was another characteristically scalding review from Nadira, the most respected and feared tea critic in the city.

07/12/2015 - Melody realised that there was no other place in the world of greater solidarity between strangers than the checkout line in the stationery store.

14/12/2015 - [insert slur here]

21/12/2015 - The world became richer with portent when Georgia began to think of every person she encountered as a mysterious stranger.

28/12/2015 - After a certain point it became impossible for Milquetoast to remind his host that he was hoping to make it to another party tonight.

04/01/2016 - Vermicellisimilitude served the realest noodles in town.

11/01/2016 - All the children in town eventually learned that purchasing a heart-shaped balloon from Mitsuko the balloon peddler was a fraught activity.

18/01/2016 - Jasper ensured that new policymakers were familiar with the party culture.

25/01/2016 - DalĂ­ Juice was known for its 100% surreal fruit juice.

01/02/2016 - Bureaucratic Business-Speak Bot was a tedious karaoke companion.

08/02/2016 - Mercedes was tired of Bettina's repeated attempts to coin portmanteaux in her presence.

15/02/2016 - I...love you? (six panels)

22/02/2016 - Each time the counter was reset, she knew that in the morning there would be a new beginning. Another tedious new beginning.

29/02/2016 - Luisa set up a motion-activated voice message at her gravestone especially for this eventuality.

07/03/2016 - Ryan privately resented Gillian's ridiculous cat names, especially when one of them went missing.

14/03/2016 - The Introvert Alliance devised a simple dance so that they could signal to each other for help in overwhelming social situations.

21/03/2016 - Whenever he was intimidated by a new task, Hiroki reminded himself of the very first difficult thing he learned.

28/03/2016 - Miranda's postbreak-up advice was strangely liberating. 

04/04/2016 - Avery spiced up her dates by deploying strategic slips-of-the-tongue.  

11/04/2016 - Yumiko and Rei were having a loud and productive brainstorming session of potential titles for their new angry talk show.

18/04/2016 - Mr Fluffy-Rump had become rather out-of-touch with his constituents ever since he'd been elected Lord Mayor of Toy Town.

25/04/2016 - At the board meeting, Heimirich delivered the bad news that sales of the company's stock images of bad news were at an all-time low this quarter.

02/05/2016 - Suddenly, Maurice realised that the epitaphs on his family's headstones were each more specific and intimidating than the last.

09/05/2016 - After two consecutive years as president of the student council, Margritte knew the two most effective ways to keep an organisation in line.

01/08/2016 - Twigford was a master of the popular literary genre The (n+1)th Thing Of Which There Are Typically Only n Things.

08/08/2016 - Dr Chopra noted a worrying trend among her clients of having feelings about feelings about feelings.

15/08/2016 - Mr Cool Beans could not be cool about this.

22/08/2016 - The highest point of Melvin's day was when he received his purchases in a plastic bag that was exactly the correct size for his kitchen bin.

29/08/2016 - Faced with yet another tedious date with a monologuing man, Thora developed a new coping strategy.

05/09/2016 - Captain Snuggle wished she were piloting an actual boat so she could sail into a rock shoal.

12/09/2016 - Brienne despised it when her daughter pretended to be her past self.

19/09/2016 - Every winter, Rochelle managed to convince at least a dozen clothing stores to take on 'LAYERS' as their core advertising slogan for the season.

26/09/2016 - Anwen and Bernadette conceded that their desperate last-minute plan to attend the costume party as literary giants was just not viable.

03/10/2016 - Cherie practised for her future dream job as a talent acquisition officer.

10/10/2016 - GrĂȘle was the protagonist of the popular fantasy RPG Fighting Disproportionately Large Insectoids With Obsolete Weaponry.

17/10/2016 - Mitchell decided it was time for some tough love.

24/10/2016 - Perhaps if she helped another species to flourish, Ruth thought, then she would have an abundance of ready allies when her own global takeover plans came to fruition.

31/10/2016 - Bed Warehouse began to shift record amounts of product after management hired cat models to lounge on all the beds.

07/11/2016 - Amanda was always looking for vivid alternatives to the phrase 'whatever floats your boat'.

21/11/2016 - #

28/11/2016 - Liesel could always count on her big sister to drop casually devastating truths.

05/12/2016 - Lucinda was dealing with her inexhaustible bitterness just fine. (Sequel)

12/12/2016 - Ariella despised it when nature joined in on her spontaneous song-and-dance numbers.

19/12/2016 - This was the last year that Mr Jingles The Overly Frank Elf would be allowed to have a speaking role in Santa's Enchanted Forest Tour.

27/12/2016 - Goodbye forever.  

13/02/2017 - 'But there's no such thing as magic,' Mr Oats thought, as something within him decided to give up on life for good, and not even his sweet wizard's hat could console him. 

20/02/2017 - The quickest way to establish herself as a pariah while out on the town, Dora found, was holding a sharp object and chanting its name relentlessly. 

27/02/2017 - Vera wished that Bertha would just admit that she preferred to dance alone. 

06/03/2017 - Antonino was causing significant confusion with his latest restaurant, Open.

13/03/2017 - Twigford also pioneered a new literary genre which celebrated passivity and inaction. 

20/03/2017 - Ernest was tired of explaining Patrick's superfluous literary references.

27/03/2017 - signs

10/04/2017 - POCKETS hell yeah (eight panels) 

17/04/2017 - Until his dying breath, Giovanni was a dedicated mansplainer. 

24/04/2017 - Euphemia and Olaf tried a little too hard to generate an aura of mystique around their latest work.

01/05/2017 - Her therapist advised her to find a mantra to recite when she was feeling anxious; thus, Susan chose her favourite phrase in the English language.

08/05/2017 - girls on phones (three panels)

15/05/2017 - global insurgency plot

22/05/2017 - June the pet clairvoyant and kibble reader occasionally had to convey awkward messages to clients.

29/05/2017 - Whenever they were mad at each other, Tatiana and Craig made increasingly wanky poetic observations until one of them cracked.

05/06/2017 - Mixed Messages FM continued to provide almost useful advice.

12/06/2017 - kill everything  

11/09/2017 - Miki was a member of the Sad Pranks Club.

18/09/2017 - Edwina needn't have worried: whatever went in the swirling vortex stayed in the swirling vortex.

25/09/2017 - floating heads

02/10/2017 - The severe funding cuts to the Museum of Natural History were really beginning to show.

09/10/2017 - word of mouth 

16/10/2017 - Kitty Bot tried earnestly to blend in.

23/10/2017 - women greeting women

06/11/2017- After a while, Nancy decided to lean into her complete inability to nurture plants.

13/11/2017 - fragile masculinity

20/11/2017 - Sure, it was fun at first, but now Agnes was getting annoyed at having a bird in the hand.

27/11/2017 - 'It's because I'm dead inside,' Lamington thought.

04/12/2017 - hello sinners

11/12/2017 - Byron didn't realise that he was turtle-y about to be assassinated by his own pets.

18/12/2017 - REASSURE ME DAMMIT

29/01/2018 - rebranding

05/02/2018 - #ifegoals

12/02/2018 - Toko was investigating how the superfluous usage of the word 'real' paradoxically called a subject's realness into question.

19/02/2018 - flailing in space

05/03/2018 - change

12/03/2018 - Not only was Shelley's Build Your Own Boyfriend prematurely activated; his personality was set to Easily Threatened Alpha Male.

19/03/2018 - smoking ruin

26/03/2018 - In the year 2020, it became mandatory for every single film ever produced to feature a character reverently whispering, 'Hope.'

02/04/2018 - I'm so scared

09/04/2018 - MEH, IT WAS OKAY I GUESS

16/04/2018 - washing machine

23/04/2018 - writers writing together

30/04/2018 - I envy your freedom

07/05/2018 - figure 3.7